I’m afraid to be me. So I pretend to be happy. So everyone sees what they want to see. A smiling face, approachable and kind. With a deep emotional secret of wanting to die. Relieve the stress, blind the fear, better yet, simply disappear. Wasting time, no sketches etched on a face of stone. No memories where tributes are laid. Those are left to the rich and famous. A cougar died today for trying to survive. He came to close to town and scared the citizens of a community. Authorities called, a rifle deployed. Down goes the cat, with a single bullet. I cried, uncontrollably cried.