Talking To My Star


Among the many, too great to count
I chose a star, the furthest one out
The glitter so faint, virtually unseen
Except for the times it pulsed a red beam

A flame that burned my eyes to see
The depth of my soul that bleeds in me
A shabby coat barely fights the cold
Ash glows from a drag, inhale and hold

A buzz filling my head, it spins round
Every rotation screams from the pain found
Flesh marred, scarred, left broken
The wild, tamed into a life beholden

I’m talking to my star, it’s so, so far
Straining to catch that stream, like radar
Trapped in a hole, clawing at dirt and roots
Staring up through the view of child abuse

The pain grows loud, strong, wills my heart to curse
Death, would you bless this life of misery or worse
Drift on by ignoring the existence of a nothing being
By leaving me to live, barely breathing, humbly pleading

Ax